Somethin’ Bloodied, Somethin’ Blue

Ah… weddings.

That special moment that two folks come together with family and/or friends to solidify their devotion and love for each other. For better of worse, til death (or related condition) do they part…

[insert record screech here]

Wait wait… You may be asking yourself:

“Why is he writing about this?”

Oh… Simple!

In many mmorpgs, folks can and do get “hitched”. Amazingly, this is not confined to RP servers. I’ve been in and helped with some weddings on PvE servers as well. These marriages range strictly from a RP standpoint (platonic) to real life couples having an symbolic wedding online. Just like in everyday life, these ceremonies can be as diverse and detailed as the couples wish to make it.

Oddly, they can also have the similar stress levels - making sure everything is alright, folks are gathered, the caterers (yeah, some have catered food!) and making sure all goes well.

“Shaw” just attended one “quickie” wedding and a “mating ritual” (Orcish wedding) less than a week from each other. On PvE servers I’ve been in and helped with ingame weddings as well. So, I thought writing about this would be helpful for others wanting the tie the knot ICly.

This can be quite a chore for a couple, so here’s some ideas, observations and tips to help!

Alot of preparation goes into one of these events, but they can be simple as well. Let’s go over some of the key components and related comments to each:

• Wedding Couple: No brainer there! The bride and the groom. It helps greatly if you do have these.

• Type of Ceremony: Here’s where the creative parts come in. Weddings can be ultra serious to funny and all things in between, it all depends on the folks involved. Race, class and character personalities all figure into what type of event to have. Orc weddings can/will lean more to a martial event, perhaps a bonding ritual or ceremonial hunt after the ceremony. A tauren or night elven wedding may be simple and more spiritual or nature based/themed. Undead, human or blood elven wedding can range from simple to highly complex. It’s all in having fun and role-playing an unique event ingame.

• Researching: Need more info, let google be your guide and research wedding traditions and such from different cultures. You may find some great tips and ideas ranging on formal settings to even more tribal. Perhaps something from fantasy or science fiction as well. A Klingon-style wedding for orcs? Why not? See what parts “fit” and will make the event fun and memorable.

• Wedding Official: This could be a priest, tribe elder or similar “official” rp justice o’ the peace. Perhaps your guild master (GM) can do the service or a RP equivalent. The type of prose or verse used can be themed to the race: A battle poem, ballad sung, or a straight forward “proper” nuptials. Perhaps a ritual battle between the two “lovebirds” - you never know! Hey, it worked on Star Trek! *grin*

• Wedding Planner/Team: A group or single player in charge of coordinating the event and making sure the bride, groom, guests, attendants and official know what the “plan” is. This can also be done by the bride and/or groom, but sometimes a third party makes things easier. This could go as far as having rehearsals, just as in real weddings. Can be fun to role-play. Tip: Nice to have a team, in case the planner gets disconnected or unexpected events happen that may take him/her offline.

• Rings/Items of Devotion: You could go “traditional” with rings or perhaps use an object to bond the union. Ceremonial blades or symbolic shackles - the limit here is your imagination. Some items can be found, crafted or quested for. Even if the item does not exist, it still can be made “real” IC by using descriptive emotes and/or conveyed during the ceremony.

• Groomsman/Bridesmaids: Depending on the races involved and related customs, these can be replaced by honor/maiden guards, attendants, guild elders or champions for each. Heck, in real life, I’ve seen dogs/pets be the attendants… really! Might be a cool idea for a hunter wedding, who knows?

• Guests: Don’t forget the guests! You know, the folks that will be invited to the event. Make a list and start early. You can make this open, just make it well known. Also decide if it’s a closed or open ceremony. Closed events do minimize possible griefers, but it closes it off for other role-players passing by that want to join in. Basically, your server and rp climate will help you decide which is right for you.

• Location: The area that you are using for the event. This can be a major concern if a heavily populated or traveled area. To minimize griefing, as remote area is best, but make sure you can plan to have lower levels come! Take in consideration the races, faction and customs when picking a wedding spot. Bonus points if you can ICly role-play it out. The final location needs to be able to fit with the number of folks that may show up. Nothing worse crowding folks in one spot.

• Guest Formation: This usually is a last minute thought, but sometimes it can work out nice to have the guests “in place” during the ceremony. Most wedding guests get a feel on their own on how to arrange themselves, some it comes from the shape of the area. A circle or semi-circle pattern, “V” formation or parallel lines left and right are “popular” groupings. Sometimes accidentally, guests arrange themselves making a nice shape - a heart-like triangle for example. Nice how it works like that.

• Time and Day: One of the hardest things to nail down. With varied schedules, raid and server times, this can be difficult for getting everyone together. The main help is to discuss this with folks and find the best date for the majority of the party. Trying to find a magical date and time for all is seldom found, so plan ahead and give everyone time - especially if the wedding is elaborate. The earlier the better!

• Schedule of Events: Plan a rough sequence of events and make sure that everyone knows what is happening and when. This helps keep the stress off the event and makes sure things go smooth. The planner or wedding team will/should help keep things in check over a raid/party channel.

• Invitations/Announcements: This can easily be done at a guild gathering, forum post or ICly via actual mail message sent in game. It’s a nice touch!

• Gifts: Gifts are optional and varies on the race and type of wedding. They can be ingame tokens of well wishes (items in game), emoted gifts (like a chest or unique gift, for instance), or quested items, like running an instance with the couple for a rare drop. The instance could be done IC and could be a nice event after the ceremony by the couple’s guild(s).

• Costuming: Take sometime and play around with what to wear. Make time and look at different looks so that it fits your character and the type of ceremony.

• Catering/Entertainment: Having a few volunteers pass out food and drink is a nice way of immersing the setting and adding a little extra to the wedding. Having a celebration/reception afterward can be fun, whether it’s a fireworks display, a snowball fight, traditonal hunting/raiding party - or even a dance!

• Impromptu Weddings and Eloping: “Quickie” weddings can be done. They are less hassle, less stress and need little or no preparation. The drawbacks are that fewer people can attend. Either type can be fun to role-play, so see what works for you and your future “spouse”. Sometimes “scheduling” OOCly works. Some role-players are more spontaneous than others, but it’s nice to try to include as many friends as possible if able.

This covers the main concerns to planning and staying sane during a role-playing wedding. The main thing is to plan what you can, be calm and understand things can and will possibly change. But all in all, sometimes that makes for a more memorable moment and good role-playing. The key thing to remember is to make this all fit your characters and have fun with it.

Think that covers quite a bit. If I think of anything else, I’ll add it in.

Oh!

The Honeymoon, you may ask? You’re on your own! *grin*